Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Living in Dreams: The Helper


This blog post will venture outside of the reality of Tammy World and venture into the alternate world of my dreams.  I often have vivid and remarkable dreams, usually remembering something about them when I wake up.  Most dreams are quickly forgotten but a few of them really stick to my mind.  I often feel that my dreams are like movies and are there for my entertainment.  Sometimes they are scary and leave with me with a bad feeling throughout the day, sometimes they are enjoyable and sometimes (though rarely) I feel they may have great meaning.  Occasionally I have lucid dreams, a dream in which I am aware that I am dreaming and may have some degree of control over the dream.  Some dreams, like the one I will describe here, are just fantastic in their own rite.  For now, I will incorporate posts on my dreams into this blog.  Dreams too, are a part of Tammy World.

Living in Dreams will be a new series within Tammy World, sort of a blog within the blog.  Occasionally I will blog on a dream or relate something that has happened in my dreams with a new installment in this series.  I am sure everyone experiences this to various degrees, but some of my dreams can be rather amazing and extraordinary.  When it comes to Living in Dreams, I will just call them like I see them.  Unless it is obvious, I don't try to attach any meaning to my dreams, even when I feel there may be some hidden meaning there.  I have not found anyone to help me find any insight as to the meaning of dreams beyond the obvious, but I am open to any interpretations or suggestions from anyone.

The Helper

The Helper is my first installment in the Living in Dreams series.  I had this dream a few nights ago and have finally decided to post it.  I feel like it has real meaning but I do not understand it or know what that meaning is.  A friend suggested that maybe it related to Spirit (or God) talking to me and offering to help me in some way.  On this particular night I had several dreams I remembered when I woke up.  Some of them were occurring at the same time, I think, and I was going back and forth between them.  This one started when I was having another dream and it is the last dream I had before waking up.  It has been a couple of days and I still remember it vividly, its just one of those dreams. Here is my description of my dream.

*****

Part of my dream was of a beautiful woman lying on the beach.  I don't think she was naked but probably had on something like a bikini.  She seemed to be getting a massage from another beautiful woman.  I was having other dreams at the same time but I kept coming back to this scene.  It appeared within the other dream like maybe a promo or commercial and then I would go back to my other, more mundane dream.  Later in this dream she had another woman lying next to her and I also noticed that they were under an umbrella.  The woman getting the massage was lying on her back and the other was on her side watching her.  There was nothing implicitly sexual about it but she was being massaged mainly around her upper thighs and hip area.  In the last part of this dream I realized that I was the woman giving the massage.  The character did not look like I do in reality but I realized it was me giving the massage.  I never saw any nudity or realized anything sexual happened, all I witnessed was simple hand to skin massage and this was viewed in the third person.   At or toward the end of this segment I realized that the woman receiving the massage had experienced an orgasm but I did not witness anything that would indicate that.  I just knew it. 

This happened on a beach, very near the water and other people were on the beach as well.  Next, I noticed I was entering the water and I placed something or something was placed onto my eyes that looked like swimming goggles.  My recollection is that when I put them on the glasses or goggles were blackened, like the goggles that had been given to me during electrolysis to protect my eyes.  I began to swim in the water but did not venture out far from the beach.  At this point the dream became at least somewhat lucid.  I realized I was dreaming and had some control of what I was doing.  Other people were in the water also and no one was going very far from the shore.  I believe I tried to swim further out but was somehow kept in very close to the beach.  At this point I realized that the water became very deep just a few feet off the beach and this point other people were in the water close to me.  It was very calm with very few waves but it was not slick calm.  I knew it was an ocean and at first the water was not very clear. 

I seemed to be moving along the beach as I was in the water, moving towards my right as I faced the horizon of the coastline.  As the dream progressed most of the other people seemed to go away and the water became very clear.  I could see an extreme drop off or ledge just a few feet out form shore.  I kept venturing down into the water but I do not remember seeing anything underneath except white sand in the shallow area.  I could not see the bottom after it got deeper.  Then it seemed like the shore took a sharp turn, like a right angle, and I swam down the beach very close to shore.  It was like there was a sandbar running parallel to shore and then the sandbar seemed to jut out from the beach aways.  I remember feeling adventurous at this point and following the sandbar further from shore and wanting to dive down into the deeper water.  I got the feeling that the water went up under the sand as if it were a ledge and I pictured the sandbar protruding out from shore. 

At this point in the dream I had the viewpoint of being in the water and part of the time being above the water, looking down on it.  The sandbar began to look like a large phallic symbol when viewed from above and as my view moved back back to shore I saw It.  There was a large monument or statue right on the beach and the sandbar appeared to be a phallus extending from this great statue or skeleton or whatever it was.  In my mind the size of the statue was like that of an Egyptian artifact like the Spinx.  It was  humanoid in appearance and in a position that I believe was seated.  It looked like a giant king seated on the beach in a Buddha like position and at times I believe it was colorful and at other times it may have been the color of the sand.  

I didn't really see anyone else there at this point and I moved (either walking or floating) up to the great relic, viewing it closer up.  At this point it came to me that the name of this thing was The Helper.  Nothing else was revealed to me about it but I now knew I was viewing something called The Helper and the sand around it seemed more like the white sand of a dessert than a beach.  Everything in the scenery was very bright with a clear blue sky and bright sunlight.  The crystal clear blue ocean was still there and I glimpsed the phallic like sandbar that protruded into the water.  At times it seemed as if I was hovering over The Helper or floating around it and the view was first person, I did not see myself or what I looked like.

In the last part of this dream my mother was with me and we were exploring The Helper as if it were a tourist site.  Some of this part of the dream I viewed in third person and some in first person, although I cannot remember what I looked like.  There were a few other people around but I only caught glimpses of them out of the corner of my eye.  At three different spots I found information boxes that contained sheets of paper, or flyers, and at each one I took a piece of paper out and examined it.  Each box was almost empty and I think I got the last sheet out of each one of them.  There may have been another information box that was empty of flyers but I remember the three sheets that I saw.  The first was titled, The Language of The Helper, and it was full of information although I did not read it, only taking it with me to study later.  The second box had something like a page from a children's coloring book with a picture of The Helper and the last box had a sheet with a picture of the woman on the beach being massaged.  I don't know if there was any writing on the last one or not but it did seem to have a trademark of some sort on the bottom right.

*****

That is how the dream ended.  This was just a basic description of my dream but I do not think words can fully convey how fantastic this dream was and is for me.  I have never had a dream quite like this one and it is still just as vivid in my memory now as it was the moment that I woke up.  To me the most remarkable thing is that I was given a name for the monument and that the name is The Helper.  So now I wonder just what this means.  Who is The Helper and why did it reveal itself to me in this way?  Is there anything I am supposed to do in real life now that I have had this dream?  What is the significance, if any, of the woman on the beach?  If such a Helper exists how can it help me or is it me that is The Helper?  Maybe it was just God talking to me in a dream, or is it something different?  Was it something spiritual speaking to me or simply a part of my mind expressing itself?

I guess I will just have to live my life and determine if this dream has any particular meaning.  I wish it had continued but I ended the description right at the point I woke up in the morning.  There are mysteries in life and often deeper mysteries in dreams.  Mine just got a little bit deeper.